I've lost weight since I started working. At first I was all like, fricking ecstatic and stuff (because my stomach was flatter and my hips were slightly smaller and so I was feeling more physically attractive)... but then today I noticed something that shook my world. In a big bad earthquake-y way.
My bra was not being filled properly. I looked down today while I was getting dressed and I noticed that on the fabric of the bra cup, there was slight... RUCHING. there was tiny little air pocket where there should've been breast. OMFG.
Like, talk about life being a bitch!
Seriously.
Seriously.
Seriously!
They should invent some fat-gene genetic control pill thing that lets you choose where to lose fat or where fat should go if you gain some. Like I would do it so when I lose weight, it goes from my bottom half FIRST, not LAST, and when I put on weight, the fresh fat would go to my BOOBS first, my bottom half and face LAST. As things stand, with Mother Gene in charge, it's the total opposite of the ideal situation.
When I put on weight (which happens if I so much as smell frying bacon, goddammit), my thighs, hips and butt (and FACE) pad out. When--presumably--all those bloomin' fat cells are so full up that there's nowhere left for the new fat to go, THEN my boobs grow a little. But it's SOOO not worth it, because I need to look disgusting EVERYWHERE ELSE on my body in order to gain half a cup size.
When I LOSE weight, the fat goes from my face, abs and boobs FIRST. The first two places? Good: One can always appreciate a more defined face and flatter belly. But to take away from what is already a very AVERAGE pair of boobs? That's just cruel. And when my poor little babies have been depleted, THEN only will my hip, thighs and bum deign to bless me with say, a piddling one-inch loss in circumference.
I haven't done my research yet, but maybe plastic surgeons can suck the fat from my heavy half and instead of throwing it all away, maybe they can syphon some of it into my boobs. That'd be convenient.
